Hold on tight

I woke up this morning thinking about Job. At the risk of my mom tuning out, I decided to write about it anyway. She does not like Job. But every time I tried to think different thoughts, he kept coming back to my mind. So, here we are.

The last two weeks have been unusually dark. Our lives have been filled with loss, death, young families being torn apart by divorce, cancer and even horror. It has not all happened, directly to our family, but it has come uncomfortably close to our door step. So, you can see why I was thinking about Job. He lost everything. His livelihood and all of his children were taken in a matter of a few short verses (Job 1:13-19). 

At times like this, it would be very easy to start questioning God. How could He let this happen? Where is the sense in this tragedy? 

At times like this, it would be very easy to start blaming God. Why would He do this? How can He hurt His children?

But, we need to take a step back. 

Job 1: 6-12

One day the angels came to present themselves before the LORD, and Satan also came with them.  The LORD said to Satan, “Where have you come from?”

Satan answered the LORD, “From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.”

Then the LORD said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.”

“Does Job fear God for nothing?” Satan replied. “Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. But now stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face.”

The LORD said to Satan, “Very well, then, everything he has is in your power, but on the man himself do not lay a finger.”

Then Satan went out from the presence of the LORD.

It wasn't God that attacked Job, it was Satan. During dark and difficult times, we need to remember that we live in a fallen world. This is no longer the Garden of Eden where everyone is good and honest and forthcoming. There is sin, sickness and pain. There are other forces at work here.

Ephesians 6:12

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

It is so easy to dwell in this darkness, to be caught up in all the scary details and questions. During these Job moments we just need a glimmer of hope. At these times, I feel like anything good will be the fresh air that I need to keep pressing on.

Mark 5:21a, 25 - 33

When Jesus had again crossed over by boat to the other side of the lake,

A large crowd followed and pressed around him. And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

At once Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around in the crowd and asked,“Who touched my clothes?”

“You see the people crowding against you,” his disciples answered, “and yet you can ask, ‘Who touched me?’ ”

But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. He said to her,“Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.”

I can remember a time not so long ago that I was on my knees praying, I knew, that if I could just touch the hem of his cloak, I would be ok. During the times of sadness, we have a choice to make. We can sit and soak in the darkness or we can push through the crowd and reach out to Him. It may be desperation or determination, but either way, our faith in Him is what leads to healing.

I have hope. My God is bigger than any of the bad things that are happening around us. He is still in control. He is always good. He cannot do anything that is not based in love. He can turn the bad things around and use them for our good or the good of others.

I had a glimmer this weekend. My little sister got married. The wedding was wonderful. We had so much fun as a family. She looked beautiful and she married a good Christian man. I know that they will have rough seasons in their marriage. Two people walking through life together is not always an easy journey. The best thing they have going for them is their love of Jesus. I know that they will make it through the dark times, because I know they will push through the crowd and grab hold of his cloak.

Lord Jesus, thank you for making yourself available to us when we need you most. You are never too busy or too far away. When we reach out to you, you are faithful to turn to us, look right at us and provide the healing that we need. Thank you for blessing us with your presence and your love. Thank you for your comfort in a world that doesn't make sense. Amen.

Praise Him

On the radio this morning, I happened to catch a few minutes of the Joyce Meyer broadcast. There was one thing that really stuck out for me. She said we need to fill our spirit. I have heard these words before, but what does it really mean? She went on to explain, that we fill our spirit when we read the word of God. When our spirit is full, we react better to life. When something bad, maybe I should say, when life happens and our spirit is full, we have better responses, use kinder words and we act out of love. When life happens, and our spirit is empty, our flesh speaks loudly! These are the times when we say hurtful things, lose our temper or we are just plain grumpy.

Everyday life is draining! I don’t always find it easy to act the way that I know God wants me to act. There are days that my patience dwindles, everything upsets and irritates me. These are the days that I need God the most! These are the times I need to stop whatever I am doing and turn to Him. Often, these are the hardest times to reach out to Him. I think it is possible that I let myself get so empty that there is nothing left. It is scary how quickly our flesh takes over: you don’t really need God. How is that really going to help you? What has He done for you lately?

The longer that I walk with Him and the more I know about Him, the easier it is for me to recognize these “empty times” in myself and even in my kids. I see the signs. Actually, I usually hear the signs before I see them and I have found a few ways to fight back against the darkness that can so easily take over.

Like every household, our morning routine is pretty rushed. I have one child who happily bounces out of bed and another who would love to sleep until about nine a.m. everyday. One or the other eventually gets upset about the toothpaste, the unequal amount of cereal in their bowl or some other great offense. When I hear the voice levels raise, I know it is time to pull out the praise music! I have stopped trying to solve the disputes or argue about who gets what color juice cup. I invite God into our morning. I have a playlist of songs that we all love. They are fast, uplifting and fun! We often “get our praise on” right in the middle of breakfast. Sometimes there is dancing, sometimes there is silliness, but there are always smiles.

Another way that we have found to fill up our spirit is, our praise jar. I got the idea during one of our Tuesday morning Bible Studies. I don’t really remember how the idea came about, but I was trying to think of ways for my little ones to be more conscious of our day and our faithful Lord. I started with a vase. It is one of those simple ones that comes with a flower arrangement that I never know whether to keep or get rid of. I cut up some pieces of colorful paper and put them in a bowl and then put a pen right there. This collection now sits on a shelf in a high traffic area, right in eye sight. It is an open invitation to praise Him. Sometimes it is one word, sometimes it is a name, sometimes it is something we saw outside, sometimes it is when are spirits are full and sometimes it is when our spirits are empty. I have found that when I am empty, I really need to look at what I have. This praise jar reminds me to focus on Him rather than on me. Physically writing it down and focusing on the good snaps me out of the darkness. I am reminded that I am not really as empty as I may feel.

Ezekiel 3:3 Then he said to me, “Son of man, eat this scroll I am giving you and fill your stomach with it.” So I ate it, and it tasted as sweet as honey in my mouth. 

I love this passage. My NIV study Bible says, “ Ezekiel must ingest the Lord’s message... so that it becomes part of his being. The words of God are sweet to the taste.” The more we fill ourselves with the goodness of His word, the sweeter our life will be. The more we praise, the happier we are. The more we spend time with Him, the more like Jesus we become.

I love looking through our praise jar. My kids are just learning to write. There are a lot of papers that say “Mom”, “Dad”, “God”. There is even one that says “elephants”. But really, what else do we need?

My Story

I have had three people within the last week mention "your story" or "your testimony". Around here, we call that an echo from God. Perhaps He is trying to tell me something!

Until yesterday, I didn't think I had a testimony. It seems silly now, but there wasn't a big life changing experience or a flash of lightning. After some reflection, I don't think that testimonies have to be that way. Some are big and exciting and "flashy" and then there is the rest of us. Normal everyday people. With normal everyday stories.

I was raised in the church by Christian parents. We went to church most Sunday's (unless someone was sick or we were out of town) and Sunday School and Vacation Bible School. In High School, I joined the Youth Group and got very involved there with activities and work/mission trips. Then college... I didn't do as well. I didn't completely walk away from God, but I am pretty sure I didn't follow the path that He had planned for me. Looking back, I know that God was with me even though I wasn't seeking Him. He put people in my life that were strong Christians and they were a good influence on me when everything else was so bad. I tried attending church there and did a few times, but it never became habit and it was so easy to just sleep in.

After college, I moved back home. I went back to church with my family and was welcomed with open arms and even taught Confirmation that year. Shortly after moving home, I met my husband and while we were dating, we often attended church. Either his or mine. Looking back at that time, I see now that I still wasn't following God. I did my best and fooled a lot of people including myself. Maybe it wasn't fooling, but ignorance on my part. 

Life went on. I went to church on Sunday and I did my own thing the rest of the week. I thought that was enough. I had the label "Christian". I had accepted Jesus. I knew right from wrong (in my own mind). I tried to be a good person, helping others, not stealing or killing. What more was there? 

This season lasted about seven years. During that time, I almost completely quit going to church. Things did not really start to change until I was trying to get pregnant for the first time. Typical of the season I was in, I didn't turn to God until I needed Him. I was fine on my own, until a crisis appeared. Then, I treated God like my personal Genie. I went through tests and took fertility medication, until I couldn't live with the side effects any longer. A month later, I was pregnant. I would like to say that I had turned to God and said, "You are bigger and You know what is best. I surrender my life to you."  But, I didn't. I thanked God and moved on. 

But, I began thinking (or rather, God placed it on my heart and I finally started to listen) that I needed more.  I wanted my child to have a good foundation. I wanted to give my baby the good morals that I had been given. In my heart, I knew there was something to the "whole church thing", I just didn't know what it was. I began "church shopping". I tried several local churches and decided on the one that was the most comfortable. I got involved with the Children's ministry and made some great friends. We stayed there for almost three years, until the church changed and I no longer felt comfortable. I took a step back to analyze the changes.

On Thanksgiving morning of 2008, I was getting ready to go to dinner at my parents house. I had the TV on for news and background noise. Joyce Meyer came on and that is when things really changed for me. I don't remember what she said exactly, but I was at that point I realized there was something more to church than "religion". That was the turning point for me, I began to find my own faith. For so long, I was living on what my parents said or the way they raised me. It wasn't until I really started doing it for me that I was able to understand what so many others already had and what God wants for all of us. I began to read my Bible, although I didn't understand it, and we found a new church. 

The new church has made a huge difference. I am really being fed the word! I didn't realize how hungry I was until I heard someone who really spoke to me. I also joined a women's Bible study. That has been a big step for me and really encouraged me in my daily walk. I enjoy reading the Bible and reading books that take me deeper in the word. I love being around Christian women who share the same values and beliefs that I do. I miss it when I am not there and have made it a priority in my schedule.

Everyday, I work at being more open about my faith and my Savior. Throughout my life, I hid my faith and beliefs (and still do to some extent) from others out of fear of rejection. What I didn't understand is that our choices are either good or bad. So, fear of rejection from people caused me to reject God. I should have feared Him more than people. I am getting better at it, and stepping out on faith more than ever before. I am trying to be open with my children, so that they will learn that God's opinion is much more important than people's opinion. I am trying to teach them that their faith is not something to hide or be ashamed of. As the women of my Bible studies have taught me, it is in the sharing that we grow.

Those who have known me for a while can appreciate that this blog was a big, scary step. I don't really know where this is all going- meaning the blog. I just felt like this was the direction that He was leading me. I have never been a writer, but it seems like He is using me for something. My wonderful and supportive Mom recently told me, "you don't need to know why, you just need to obey and trust in Him who always knows".

That is the cool thing about God! He is not normal or everyday. He is creative and exciting and unexpected. When we follow Him, our lives are that way too. Looking back, I see that His fingerprints are all over my life! This is not really my story it is our story.

1 Kings 19:11-12 (New Living Translation)

 ¹¹ “Go out and stand before me on the mountain,” the Lord told him. And as Elijah stood there, the Lord passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. ¹² And after the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper.

Lord, I am a sinner. On my own, I am not good enough to come into your presence. I believe that Jesus died on the cross to save me from my sins. I believe that he rose and ascended into heaven. Through my belief in Jesus I am able to come to you at the throne. Thank you Abba, that you were faithful when I was fickle. Thank you for pursuing me when I turned away. Thank you for loving me when I was unloveable. Amen.

BFF

I love that God’s word is so consistent. I still amazes me, that you can take two completely separate books in the Bible, like today’s reading, and find so much commonality. It is comforting to worship a God who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8).

In 1 Timothy 6, Paul is warning Timothy and his church of the evil that is spreading through the people around them. In Jeremiah, God is warning the prophet about the growing wickedness that surrounds him. God tells Jeremiah, be careful of everyone around you. In both cases, the questionable people, had turned from God and were seeking the wrong things. They claimed to be good and yet they were going from sin to sin. They loved money and were seeking it more than anything else. They craved material things that would show their status. They sought success according to what others defined as successful.

These warnings came thousands of years ago, and yet they are still true today. It is so easy to listen to the worldly people and messages that surround us. 

“You will be happy when...” 

“To be a success...”

“If you owned...”

With only this little bit of information, it would be easy to start analyzing all of our

relationships, identify the “bad eggs” and toss them out of our lives. But, this is not God’s way. We will never learn to be victorious in a fallen world if we are trying to get rid of our problems instead of learning to overcome them.

So, what are we to do? The answer is simple: B.F.F.

1. Boast- Do not boast of your riches, your successes, or your wisdom. Boast in the fact that you know the Lord, who is kind, just and righteous. (Jeremiah 9:23-24)
2. Flee- I found humor in the fact that Paul says, “we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it” (1 Timothy 6:7). All of the material things that the world tells us we “need” to make us happy will still be here when we are gone. These things don’t really matter. “Flee from these things, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness”.
3. Fight- In a dark world, we have to fight to hold on to truth. “Fight the good fight of faith take hold of the eternal life to which you were called”. (1 Timothy 6:12) We need to know God’s way and hold tight to it.

My husband is a good judge of character. Within the first few moments of meeting someone, he has a fairly good idea of who they are and what they are about. I on the other hand, am not. It takes me a while to know someone and even after being around someone, I am often surprised that they turn out to be completely different than I first thought. It is so hard for me to know who to trust, who to believe and who is truly a person of good character (not just good at acting).

It is hard to find someone who is always a good influence on our lives. But, there is someone we can trust every time, who we can turn to for answers, who will guide us and teach us the right way. God only wants the best for us. He wants to bless us and give us good things, but He will not do it if the cost is our relationship with Him. He wants to be our best friend! He wants to be the first one we reach out to. He wants us to follow Him because He knows what is best for us. The bonus is that the more time we spend with Him, the better women we become.

Lord, I thank you for always wanting the best for me. I don’t want to be a rebellious child. I don’t want to go after the things of this world, but I know at times I do. Please forgive me for the times that I did not seek you first. Please teach me your ways. Change my heart, so that I will pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness rather than the material things that do not last. I want to follow in the footsteps of Jesus. I want to seek you first today and everyday. I love you and I thank you for loving me so completely, just as I am. Amen.

Who is your B.F.F? He is calling you right now. 

Hugs,

Lynnette

You Alone

I woke up in such a bad place today- to be honest- I went to sleep in one too. Picking up, cleaning up, putting away, bringing in. Why doesn't anyone do for themselves? Why am I the only one who sees the dirt on the floor or the garbage cans at the street? There is so much that needs to be done and so much that I want to do.

God, help me! I am in an ugly place!

1 Peter 5:8 Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.

Father, save me and deliver me.

Psalm 7:1-2 O LORD my God, I take refuge in you;
save and deliver me from all who pursue me,

² or they will tear me like a lion
and rip me to pieces with no one to rescue me.

Lord, help me to be happy.

Psalm 5:11 But let all who take refuge in you be glad;
let them ever sing for joy.
Spread your protection over them,
that those who love your name may rejoice in you.

Father, please fill me with joy.

Psalm 4:7 You have filled my heart with greater joy
than when their grain and new wine abound

God, I praise you!

1 Samuel 2:1-10
Hannah's Prayer
¹ Then Hannah prayed and said:
"My heart rejoices in the LORD;
in the LORD my horn is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.

² "There is no one holy like the LORD;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God.

³ "Do not keep talking so proudly
or let your mouth speak such arrogance,
for the LORD is a God who knows,
and by him deeds are weighed.

⁴ "The bows of the warriors are broken,
but those who stumbled are armed with strength.

⁵ Those who were full hire themselves out for food,
but those who were hungry hunger no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children,
but she who has had many sons pines away.

⁶ "The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave and raises up.

⁷ The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.

⁸ He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.
"For the foundations of the earth are the LORD's;
upon them he has set the world.

⁹ He will guard the feet of his saints,
but the wicked will be silenced in darkness.
"It is not by strength that one prevails;

¹⁰ those who oppose the LORD will be shattered.
He will thunder against them from heaven;
the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.
"He will give strength to his king
and exalt the horn of his anointed."

You alone are worthy of praise.

Fill 'er up

Mr. D and I were in the car not too long ago and a song came on about giving love away.
He asked "why would you give your love away?"
I said, "we give it away because it makes others feel better. Just like when Mommy hugs and kisses you , or when you tell Mommy you love her."
"Or when I share with my sister" he replied.
"Yes, that's right. You've got it!" I said.
"What if I don't have any love to give?" He asked.
I said, "Well, then you tell God you need more to give and He will fill you up. That's what God teaches us. That if we ask, He will give us love to give to others. We will never be empty because God will always give us more."
"I think I might be empty" he stated sadly.
"Tell God", I replied.
"God, can you fill my tank up, please?" He asked expectantly.

It is so easy to teach my children, but do I ever listen to my own words? I often feel empty, but I don't often ask for a fill up. I do other "things" like read my Bible, study my books, listen to praise music. All of these things are good and edifying and they work. I guess because I am a "grown up" I feel like I need to behave like a grown up. I should love God in a grown up way. But then, there is Matthew 18:3 unless you become like little children you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. With God I don't always have to be an adult. No matter what my age, I will always be His child. And that is grace. God will always love me and always give me what I need.

Father, please fill me up. My love tank is empty.

The Oil of Gladness

Easter is so close. I am thinking a lot about death right now because someone special to me is very sick. We don't know what is going to happen. There is so much pain in loss. We feel it here.

God made the biggest sacrifice by sending his only son to die for us. That must have been a painful decision to make. But, it was necessary. The Lord does not want anyone to perish. (2 Peter 3:9) Time after time, God watched as people denied Him or chose to do things on their own. (Sounds like me.) The people of Israel couldn't do it- they were God's chosen people. Exodus 19:5 If you obey me and keep my covenant- you will be my treasured possession. Yet, they made golden calves (Ex 32:7-8) and built high places to worship other gods (2 Kings 17:9).

God knew from the beginning that his people needed a savior. When He created the garden of Eden, he already had Calvary planned. He knew why he was sending his son to earth. Yet He had to do it. He loved us so much that he sent his son (John 3:16) to die a terrible, painful and tortuous death (Matthew 27:27-50).

It reminds me of my loved one, watching someone we love in pain and suffering. God watched his son and could not take that from him. Like us, Jesus asked his Father to take it away. In fact, he asked twice, Matthew 26:39 & 42. But, God could not. Jesus had to die so that we could know heaven (John 3:16). It is difficult to watch someone we love, hurt and know there is nothing more we can do.

I am not comparing my loved one to Jesus. I am saying that God understands the pain and hurt that we experience.

You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book.
- Psalm 56:8

Instead of turning against Him, we need to turn towards Him. He is the God of all comforts (2 Cor 1:3-4) and that is why he sent his son.

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

Isaiah 61:1-3

Don't Get Mad....

Last night at dinner, Mr. D said "Mom, don't get mad, get glad". I thought he was just parroting a commercial he had heard, but then it came back to me again today. Maybe there is more to it?

What is written?
Habakkuk 3:17-18 Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my savior. Now that is trouble! It is so easy to get upset and frustrated during the day. Things don't go as I plan and it seems that I can't get past it- the anger and frustration keeps stacking up. I recently heard Beth Moore talking about trouble she said "irritations are not tribulations". I face irritations everyday! I need to work on keeping it all in perspective.

Philippians 4:4,7 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Why rejoice again and again? When we are rejoicing and praising God, even in the midst of trouble, we are focusing on the good not the bad. We cannot be rejoicing and sinning at the same time. Prov 29:22 An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins. And Prov 10:19 When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise. It is not what happens to me but how I react that really matters, so rejoice (as long as it takes)!

John 16:33 I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. We will face trials of many kinds, but this testing is what makes us more like Christ.

So the next time there are three spills during dinner and library books and homework are ruined in the process.... I will remember "Don't get mad, get glad and rejoice!" (I hope.)